90s News

Billy Corgan and Jessica Simpson are dating. Yes that's right, that means Corgan and Nick Lachey have been in the same vagina! Hopefully some hot gash and a little dose of the limelight will pull him out of the epic slump he's been in. Yo Billy, why don't you get D'arcy off the farm and James out of that boy band, and starting writing some cool songs again you douche! Jimmy won't even play with you anymore, he doesn't need the heroin that bad. You also need to disown those last few aborted children of records that you put out as 'Smashing Pumpkins' or Zwan (including the 44 song poop-fugue you're about to release), have Alan Moulder and Flood dial you in some good tone, and stop wearing limited edition shiny gold Dunks!! Alright, brahda? And if you make a sex tape with Pete Wentz banging the Simpson sisters, SEND IT TO US.